to a secret admirer

Hi All, Just want to share this bit of mushiness... so cute... hehehehe :-p

ODE TO A SECRET ADMIRER did you ever love a boyand know he didn't love you?did you ever feel like crying and think what good it'll do for you?did you ever look into his eyesand say a little prayer?did you ever look into his heartand wished you were there?did you ever see him dancingwhen the lights were way down low?did you ever say "God, now I love him"and just couldn't let him know?did you ever wonder where he isat night, perhaps with someone new?one moment you're happynext moment you're blue..so, if you'll fall in l o ve, my friendyou'll find it doesn't payalthough it causes broken hearts, it happens everydayand when it starts you'll never know,you'll worry day and nightyou just couldn't let him see you, it'll never turn out rightlove is great but it hurts so muchand the price you pay is high, so if you'll have to choose between life and deathi think I'd rather die..so, if you'll fall in love, my friendyou'll be hurt, oh yes, it's true..you see, my friend, you oughtta knowcoz i fell in love with you ... "One day you'll ask me as to which is more important.. YOU or MY LIFE?? i'll say my life and you'll go and leave without knowing that you are MY LIFE.. "

Untold Pinoy Story No, 6 and 7

Untold Pinoy Story No. 6

East and West

The Story of the Muslim Princess

Suppose that there was a Muslim princess from the flood capital of the Philippines, Malabon, who has just finished her degree in Mass Communications from the University of the Philippines with Latin honors (cum laude). Suppose that she decided to work for Discorama.

Remember the Saturday afternoon show on GMA Channel 7 with former Senator Tito Sotto, his brother Vic Sotto and comedian Joey de Leon as hosts? The Muslim princess was assigned to host the Tough Hits segment of the show. As Tough Hits girl, she did the weekly countdown of popular songs with bastardized lyrics to elicit cheap laughs. Her mother, who was an executive at the Philippine National Bank in Escolta, just shrugged her shoulders whenever her colleagues would ask about her favorite daughter's TV show.

Soon, a female newscaster of a major TV network introduced the Muslim princess to her brother, a flight steward. After a whirlwind
courtship, the Muslim princess married the flight steward who used to be a child actor whose only claim to fame was playing the role of a toddler Bongbong Marcos in a Marcos bio-flick. After a couple of months, the Muslim princess and the flight steward quietly separated.

But career-wise, lady luck smiled at the Muslim princess when she was given a big break by the major TV network. She bagged the plum assignment of delivering the evening news while at the same time hosting a successful TV magazine program which was pitted against a similar program in a rival TV network hosted by her former UP professor. However, the Muslim princess was such a perfectionist that it was reportedly not uncommon to see objects flying whenever she was unsatisfied with her TV staff's work.

Later, the Muslim princess got married again, this time to a well-
known local politician from a province south of Manila. The namesake of her father, her politician husband had grown-up children close to the Muslim princess' age and it was being talked about that his first wife lived in the same condominium building where the Muslim princess and her new husband occupied the penthouse. The Muslim princess' husband also reportedly decided to become a Muslim so that he could have more than one wife. They were blessed with two sons.

The Muslim princess' husband soon retired from politics and became contented with being a magician and a human toothpaste applier for his Muslim princess' toothbrush. (Incidentally, the Muslim princess once appeared in a Close-Up Toothpaste TV commercial.) Now, the Muslim princess and her magician husband (He could make a big Coke bottle disappear before your eyes.) are happily separated. Later, the Muslim princess' husband was accused of being responsible for the disappearance of his close friend.

The Story of the Black Nazarene Devotee Suppose that there was a Black Nazarene devotee from the tamaraw capital of the Philippines who claimed to have graduated with a business degree from the University of the East despite his critics' contention that he just bought his college diploma from the sidewalk of C. M. Recto Avenue. He worked as a radio reporter for a major
radio and TV network. With perseverance, he was given a Sunday morning radio show. Later, he would occasionally pinch-hit for
announcers whenever they would not show up for their radio program. He also hosted a daily radio serialization of movies for a program dubbed as Sineradyo.

His biggest TV break came when a TV network hired him for a top- rated showbiz-oriented TV show called See-Tru. The show was hosted by gossip queen, Lourdes Jimenez-Carvajal who was more popularly known as Inday Badiday or Ate Luds to her legions of fans. The Black Nazarene devotee's appearance was only through voice-over (and he was never really seen by the TV audience) and it was always preceded by his usual line: "Ate Luds, may phone-in question po tayo rito galing kay...". Yes, his job involved reading TV audience's phone-in questions to Inday Badiday's movie star guests. However, despite the TV show's enormous popularity, it was immediately cancelled after one
of the show's female guests hurled an ashtray at another female guest.

Later, the Black Nazarene devotee married a lady executive of the radio and TV network where he had moved up to become the host of its early morning radio show. They adopted a girl and had a younger son later.

Never The Twain Shall Meet

Suppose that the Muslim princess and the Black Nazarene devotee met in the same office where they both work. Suppose also that the Black Nazarene devotee personally chose the Muslim princess as one of the principal sponsors for his adopted daughter's wedding to one of the members of the staff of his widely popular TV program.

Suppose further that both the Muslim princess and the Black Nazarene devotee became elected government officials and they both decided to run for the same government office on the same year. They both run for say, the presidency of the Philippines. No, that's being too ambitious. Okay, suppose that they both run for the position of Vice President under opposing political parties. Who would you vote for?

The Muslim princess or the Black Nazarene devotee?

If you would vote for the Muslim princess, you just wasted your vote.

If you would vote for the Black Nazarene devotee, you are good at spotting a winner (but it does not mean that you did not also waste your vote).

Because the honorary Muslim princess is former Senator Loren Legarda who lost her bid for the Vice Presidency of the Philippines in the2002 national elections.

And yes, the Black Nazarene devotee who helps carry the replica of the Black Nazarene image barefoot and wearing only a white undershirt (sans bullet-proof vest) during the annual Quiapo procession as part of his religious devotion (yes, he still does it up to this day) is Noli de Castro, current Vice President of the Philippines.

Untold Pinoy Story No. 7

Pure Innuendoes

They were the best of friends. They were always seen together around the University of the Philippines (UP) campus in Diliman: one was undoubtedly a very good-looking guy and the other was unquestionably a plain-looking guy. Opposites really attract. Hey, but they're both brilliant students. Well, birds of the same feather also flock together. Indeed, they were very close to each other. Unusually close.

They were the perfect tandem. Like suman and ripe mango. Or nuts and bolts. Peg and a hole.

They were both prot�g �es of then UP Student Council chairman Chito Gascon. Soon, the good-looking guy took the helm as UP Student Council chairman. But the best friends seem to follow each other's path. The plain-looking guy also ran for the same position with the all-out support of his good-looking friend. He won, of course.

The good-looking guy was the crush ng bayan of the iskolars ng bayan.

During lunchtime, students of all persuasions flocked to the College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) cafeteria to catch a glimpse of the good- looking guy. Even singer-actress Regine Velasquez later admitted on national television that she had a big crush on the good-looking guy.

But loveless Regine's daring admission did not earn her even just a movie date invitation from the good-looking guy; instead, the good- looking guy merely flashed a demure smile in response to desperate Regine's thinly-veiled date invitation.

But after finishing college, the best friends went their separate
ways. (Or so it seemed). The plain-looking guy pursued his law
studies and later taught law courses. The good-looking guy delivered the evening news on TV, hosted a TV quiz show and wrote analytical articles on pop culture. His good looks, intelligence and impeccable manner endeared him to televiewers.

Despite their divergent career choices, the good-looking guy and the plain-looking guy really seemed to follow each other's path. But this time, their path led to a nice little apartment near the Ateneo de Manila campus. And they shared that nice little apartment. Just the two of them.

Yes, the plain-looking guy and the good-looking guy lived together.

Those gifted with wild imagination got titillated at the mere thought of these two young men sharing a lovely apartment. The moralists out there shook their heads at the mere thought of the goings-on beyond that innocent-looking apartment door amid rows of middle-class houses in Loyola Heights in Quezon City.

But the pair would not budge from their nest. Nor would they yield to any pressure. Not even from the plain-looking guy's bible-reading siblings who berated him for living with another guy. The plain- looking guy's own family started to cast doubt about his masculinity.

All telltale signs which have accumulated all those years could no
longer be ignored. People started talking openly about the two guys.

Speculations about the true nature of the pair's friendship became a daily fodder for gossip mongers. The academic freedom which alma mater UP's oblation symbolizes seemed to have gone beyond the duo's lust for knowledge.

In order to prove to his family that he was not what they thought he was, the plain-looking guy suddenly announced that he was getting married. His family jumped with joy.

But the plain-looking guy's marriage did not dispel wild speculations about his sexuality; instead, it only succeeded in erasing any remaining doubt about his alleged agenda of using his wife to finally succeed in his failed initial crack at pursuing his lifelong dream.

And it was well worth his efforts. Because this former loser's
desperate act finally triumphed. Thanks to his wife.

However, the plain-looking guy's deep friendship with his good-
looking friend took a backseat as a result of the former's new civil
status. The plain-looking guy did not want to hurt his new wife's
flourishing career nor spoil his newfound success. That's why he
played his role as a good family man to the hilt. However, he had not forgotten his good-looking best friend at all. As a token of their undying friendship, the good-looking guy stood as one of the godfathers of the plain-looking guy's first baby, together with Edu Manzano, Cesar Montano, Cherie Gil, Ciara Sotto, Angeli Valenciano, Fanny Serrano and a host of other household names. Of course, the plain-looking guy's wife was clueless about her husband's past.

But the plain-looking guy's wife had her share of dark past. She is a single mother who parted ways with her good-looking "first husband" after she discovered that her good-looking "first husband" was already married to another woman when she hastily married him after she got pregnant at a young age. This meant that her marriage to her good-looking "first husband" was not legally binding after all. Now, the plain-looking guy was her knight-in-shining- armor who rescued her from the stigma of being an unmarried mother.

Ironically, while her non-binding marriage with her good-
looking "first husband" was solemnized by several high-ranking
priests at the cavernous Manila Cathedral amid countless clicking
cameras and thousands of shrieking admirers several years ago, her supposedly legitimate marriage with the plain-looking guy was
officiated not by a Catholic priest but by a pastor in a cramped
living room, with only few relatives and friends as witne
Later, the good-looking guy reportedly got married also without
fanfare. They said that his bride was a creative consultant for ABS- CBN Interactive. However, some women still believe and hope that he is still unmarried to this day.

The good-looking guy soon rose to become ABS-CBN News Channel's (ANC) Director for Current Affairs. He has been circling the globe as host of ANC's weekly travel show, Executive Class.

Yes, the good-looking guy is David Celdran.

And the plain-looking guy is megastar Sharon Cuneta's husband,
Senator Francis "Kiko" Pangilinan.

Untold Pinoy Story No. 5

She was born on the day of hearts, February 14. But her parents did not name her Valentina. Not even Venus or Aphrodite. They opted for the holy-sounding Kristina Bernadette. But she did not turn out to be a saint.

Being the youngest, Kristina Bernadette captured the heart of her father. Father and daughter were inseparable. Until tragedy struck.

Kristina Bernadette's father was sent to prison. His heart ailment
grew worse there.

On February 14, 1974, Valentine's Day, Kristina Bernadette celebrated her third birthday with her father in prison. On the same day, a man was exchanging hearts with a southern belle in nearby San Juan church.

Nine years later, on August 21, the man who got married in San Juan church was celebrating his birthday with his basketball buddies. On the same day, Kristina Bernadette's father was killed.

Kristina Bernadette and the married man never knew each other. They lived very different lives. But in 1994, Kristina Bernadette and the married man met at work. Their first meeting blossomed into deep friendship. Some said that she longed for a father figure. But the friendship blossomed into romance which went beyond control. Kristina Bernadette used her heart, not her head. She decided to live with the married man.

Kristina Bernadette's mother was furious at the relationship. How
could Kristina Bernadette's mother like a man who celebrates his
birthday every year on the death anniversary of her murdered husband? But more than this was the fact that the man's heart already belonged to someone else. In fact, he has a grown-up daughter in New York who was nearly Kristina Bernadette's age. Despite her religious mother's efforts to put an end to Kristina Bernadette's adulterous affair with the man, Kristina Bernadette had her way. It didn't matter to Kristina Bernadette that her decision prevented her from receiving church communion because she was openly living in sin.

It did not take long before Kristina Bernadette gave birth to her
love child who was the spitting image of her live-in partner. But
Kristina Bernadette's son was born with Attention Deficit Hyper-
Activity Disorder. Her son's birth softened the heart of Kristina
Bernadette's mother who announced that Kristina Bernadette's son was her favorite grandson. When Kristina Bernadette first planned to have a liposuction, her mother tried to stop her, warning Kristina Bernadette that she (the mother) was too old to take care of Kristina Bernadette's son if something happened to her during her surgery. But as in the past, Kristina Bernadette had her way. She went on with her liposuction.

But Kristina Bernadette's relationship with her live-in partner was
not meant to last. In her Ateneo accent, Kristina Bernadette would always correct her live-in partner's grammatical lapses. Her live-in partner also got annoyed whenever Kristina Bernadette would hand him a stick of Milagrosa candle every time he used the bathroom.

According to Kristina Bernadette, the candle helped drive away the stinking smell of her live-in partner's crap. Kristina Bernadette
confessed that she learned this trick from her mother. And when
Kristina Bernadette's live-in partner stopped pursuing his petition
for the annulment of his first marriage in San Juan church, Kristina
Bernadette began to express doubt about her live-in partner's
sincerity in marrying her. Kristina Bernadette's heart was hurt.

Their relationship turned for the worse.

Kristina Bernadette finally realized that her live-in partner could
never be her savior. She decided to leave the father of her son and her live-in partner for many years: Philip Salvador.

Yes, Kristina Bernadette is the youngest daughter of President
Corazon (means heart in Spanish) Aquino and the late Senator Benigno Aquino, Jr.

And yes, Kristina Bernadette Cojuangco Aquino is the full name of
Kris Aquino.

And everyone knows the heart of her story.

joke time

Ang mga Bisaya di ko maintindihan English nila.
English ng isda... pis.
English ng mukha... pis.
Ng pandikit... pis.
Ng kapayapaan.. . pis.
Tinanong pa ako kung saan ako nakatira... Pis 1 o Pis 2?
Pisti!


(in a cabinet meeting ...)
GMA: oshige ... kung shino man ang tamaan ng bola na
'to ay siyang magre-reshign
(initsa ang bola, tumalbog pabalik sa kanya ...)
GMA: o ... praktish lang un noh? ulet!


Director: "Sir, we have to do something with our
population program. A woman gives birth every 30
seconds here in the Philippines . ..
Erap: "Ha?, you're right...FIND THAT WOMAN!!!"


Pare1: Pare, bat naman hanggang ngayon wala ka pang
syota? wala ka pa bang napupusuan?
Pare2: Meron.. Manhid ka lang!


Mom: baby, you're good in math. Now I'm going to ask you
a question.
Baby: sure mom
Mom: if your daddy gives you 3 apples and I give you 4
apples, what's your answer?
Baby: thank you po!!!


BF: may malaki ako problema.
GF: wag mo sabihin problema MO lang, problema NATIN
dahil nagmamahalan tayo.ngayon ano problema natin?
BF: nabuntis NATIN si inday at TAYO ang ama


Pare1: pare parang malalim ang iniisip mo!
Pare2: nanaginip ako kagabi kasama ko 50 contestants
ng Ms. Universe
Pare1: swerte mo! ano problema mo?
Pare2: pare, ako nanalo!!!


Killer: father mangungumpisal po ako
Father: ano kasalanan mo?
Killer: pumatay po ako ng 20 tao
Father: bakit?
Killer: kasi po naniniwala sila sa Diyos, kayo po
naniniwala ba?
Father: dati...pero ngayon trip trip na lang!


Patient: doc takot po ako sa bunot
Dentist: eto gamot pampatapang ng loob
Patient: (ininom ang gamot)
Dentist: ano matapang ka na ba?
Patient: oo doc! puta pag may gumalaw ng ngipin ko
basag ang bungo!


Passenger taps taxi driver's shoulder...
WAAAAAHHHHHH! !!! screamed the driver...
Passenger: bakit ka sumigaw?
Driver: sorry bossing bago lang kasi ako sa taxi. 25
years po kasi ako driver ng funenaria


1 panget na babe, hinoholdap
Holdaper: holdap ito! akin na gamit mo!
Babae: RAPE! RAPE! RAPE!
Holdaper: anong rape? holdap nga to eh!
Babae: wala lang! nagsusuggest lang...


1 lasing nasalubong ang matabang babae na may kasamang
aso
Lasing: hoy, saan mo nakuha yang baboy?
Babae: aso ito hindi baboy!
Lasing: huwag ka nga sumabat! yung aso ang kausap ko!


In a pet shop...
Customer talking to a parrot...
Customer: hoy! can you talk ha?! bobo!!!
Parrot: yes i can!!! ikaw?! can you fly ha? GAGO!!!


Priest: ang mga bakla'y walang lugar sa kaharian ng
langit
Mga bakla: okey lang po father..dun na lang kami sa rainbow mag slide-slide! !!

Untold Story No. 4

At a tender age of 17, Marcial was a war correspondent for The Manila Times.. Marcial's war experience provided him with a treasure chest of stories which inspired him to write a movie screenplay. His screenplay was made into a movie, starring Jaime de la Rosa and a 16- year old actress named Dorothy.. Helmed by renowned director Lamberto Avellana, the movie was a huge success. During the first FAMAS award ceremony in 1952, Dorothy received the first FAMAS trophy for best supporting actress for her role in the movie.

The only child of a US soldier and a Filipina, Dorothy was also a
semi-finalist in the 1952 Miss Philippines beauty contest. It was
therefore not surprising that Marcial got so enamored with Dorothy that he did everything to court her. Marcial even carried Dorothy's make-up kit during movie shootings. Marcial became Dorothy's dakilang alalay.

Dorothy studied pre-Law at the University of Santo Tomas but her booming movie career made it impossible for her to continue.

Likewise, Marcial took up Law at the University of the Philippines
but the lure of journalism ended his dream of becoming a lawyer.

Marcial became known for his gift of gab and political skill. This
led to his victory as a town mayor at a young age of 22. Meanwhile, Dorothy became popular for her acting prowess and dancing skill. This led to her victory in several acting derbies. Marcial's younger sister was the director of the movie which won for Dorothy her last FAMAS best supporting actress award.

But while Philippine politics and show business naturally intertwine, political kingpin Marcial and movie queen Dorothy were not destined to be together.

Dorothy married a man named Victorino who fathered her only daughter.

But their union did not last. After a series of unsuccessful
relationships, Dorothy finally tied the knot again with an American B-movie actor-singer. In contrast, Marcial remained faithfully married all his life to an American-educated woman who bore his only son and four daughters.

But while Marcial survived the Korean War which he covered, he did not survive the war on the home front. Likewise, Dorothy did not survive her own war at home.

Both Marcial and Dorothy suffered violent deaths. Marcial was shot.

Dorothy was stabbed several times.

Committed 18 years apart, the separate murders of Marcial and Dorothy made headlines several years ago. However, both murders remained unsolved to this day. Some say that identifying their killers is not the issue because everyone, except the authorities, seems to know the identity of their respective killers. Rumors even abound that the masterminds in the murders of Marcial and Dorothy were related to them by affinity. But the real mystery lies in the fact that the perpetrators of these high-profile crimes remain scot-free to this day, despite the enormous clout which the victims' respective family wields.

Some say that Marcial's death was a result of his being branded a communist by the government. This is ironic because the screenplay which Marcial wrote and which won for Dorothy her first FAMAS trophy was the second in a trilogy of anti-communist movies which were produced by LVN Pictures in support of the government's efforts to fight communism.

Dorothy's shocking death led to embarrassing revelations about her painful personal battle. Marcial's equally shocking death led to well-deserved recognition of his heroic political battle.

Dorothy was killed amid rows of cars in the covered and dark parking lot of the Movie and Television Review and Classification Board(MTRCB) building. Despite his escorts, Marcial was killed amid rows of airplanes in a wide open space in broad daylight while descending down the tarmac of what was then known as the Manila International Airport (MIA).

Of course, we all know Dorothy as Dolphy's TV wife, Marsha.

And we all know Marcial as Cory's real-life husband, Ninoy.

Yes, Dorothy Jones was the real name of Nida Blanca.

And yes, Marcial Bonifacio was the fictitious name on the passport of Benigno Aquino, Jr. on the day that he was murdered.

And you know the rest of their stories.